Reasons Why Guys Distance Themselves After Intimacy

Why do guys distance themselves after Intimacy?

A female friend of mine recently walked up to me in the office with frustration written all over her face and asked me” why do guys distance themselves after intimacy”?

I have also heard ladies complain with disappointment; he changed after we slept together, he stopped texting me after we slept together, he started acting weird after we had sex and all sorts of ill-treatment meted out on them by men.

Moreover, a  guy who has good intentions for the relationship with you wouldn’t even think of distancing himself from you after intimacy, instead, he will fall in love with you the more.

You may also be asking yourself, what do guys actually think after sleeping with you?

Well, what a guy thinks after sleeping with you is largely dependent on the type of love he has for you and the nature of the relationship with you.

If he has genuine intentions for you, he would fall in love with you more but if on the contrary, the relationship is a no-strings-attached relationship, he will have that feeling of his sexual desire being satisfied. Nothing more, nothing less.

It would be wise for us to understand the meaning of intimacy before we proceed to the main subject topic for easy understanding.

What Is Intimacy?

Intimacy is the state of feeling emotionally, sexually, and physically connected to someone.

What is intimacy?

Intimacy involves sharing your emotions, pains, sadness, happiness, etc with your partner.

Unarguably, an intimate relationship is basically a platonic, romantic, and sexual relationship but not only limited to sexuality as it also involves non-sexual relationships.

Why Do Guys Distance Themselves After Intimacy?

Here is the answer to the constant query among ladies ,why do guys distance themselves after intimacy?

Reasons abound why guys distance themselves after you slept together with them.

Some of these reasons why guys distance themselves after intimacy are:

1. He’s Scared

A lot of men prefer non-monogamous relationships to having only a partner.

Most men tend to be afraid of going into a serious relationship with someone because they aren’t ready for the emotional, physical, and financial commitment that comes with being in a relationship with only one partner.

They, therefore, prefer to go for friends with benefits type of relationship which will give them room for having more than just a sexual partner.

Also, some men who are very emotional when It comes to love do shy away from going into a serious relationship because they’re afraid of their trust being betrayed because rebuilding trust is one of the hardest things to rebuild if broken.

2. He Sees Intimacy As Fun

He probably sees having sex as fun and considers the relationship a no-strings-attached relationship and nothing more while you on the other end is catching feelings after having sex with him.

Why do guys distance themselves after Intimacy?

You may notice a change in the character of men after sleeping with them-he would gradually start acting distant from you and may even stop texting you with those sweet romantic words over text message, on Facebook, or on Snapchat like before.

Since he came for the fun of it and nothing serious and he has gotten what he wanted which is sex, he will see no reason why he should be all over you again.

3. He Didn’t Enjoy The Sex

This may sound weird but this is the blatant truth why most men start being distant and giving you attitudes after the physical intimacy.

Great sex is one of the keys to a long-lasting and healthy relationship and that is the reason why relationship therapists lay so much emphasis on physical intimacy.

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Perhaps you both have talked dirty for a long time another how good you are in bed but unfortunately, the reverse became the case after you slept with him.

Since your body chemistry didn’t match and his expectations were not met, he would definitely walk away without even a goodbye.

4. You’re Too Forward

Men don’t like to be rushed into a relationship and if you try to push them into a relationship after having sex with them, they would likely start being distant from you.

Some ladies make the mistake of being too forward after sex by preparing breakfast in bed for him, start talking about the future with him and its likes all after the first sexual experience.

These acts could be a total turn off and the guy will see you as a desperate lady who’s looking for someone to fall into her relationship net.

Allow things to flow naturally and watch the magic happen. If he really loves you, he would even fall in love with you the more after intimacy.

Being too forward will never make him fall in love with rather it would cause more harm than good to you.

5. You’re Too Clingy

Everybody likes his or her space.

Having sex with a guy shouldn’t warrant you to cling to him.

If you cling to a guy after intimacy or they notice signs of a prospective clinginess in you, they consider it toxic and tend to flee as fast as possible.

You will see some ladies start stalking a guy and start bombarding him with love messages and it’s like without the guy reciprocating.

If you’re guilty of doing this, it’s high time you put that attitude to a halt because that’s an act of clinginess and it will surely scare him away from you.

Clinging on a guy will never make him love you rather it will cause you more harm than good.

So allow things to take its the natural course.

6.  Inferiority Complex

Inferiority complex is one of the things that make a guy keep his distance from you after intercourse.

Perhaps, he’s thinking that he didnt perform well in the bed and it’s giving him great concern but he will never tell you.

Any guy who has an inferiority complex will never want to meet you again after you have sex with him because of a lack of self confidence.

Give him the confidence by telling tell him how good he was and he will stop distancing himself.

Why Do Guys Distance Themselves In A Relationship?

You may have noticed that some guys suddenly start to distance themselves when falling in love with a girl they like.

Below are some of the reasons why he suddenly starts pulling away especially  in a long-distance relationship:

1. He’s Afraid Of Getting Hurt

Maybe he hasn’t had the best of luck when it comes to relationships.

He may have had an ugly past relationship experience that left an indelible emotional scar on him and thus made him afraid of experiencing yet another horrible emotional torture.

So a guy distancing himself after falling in love with you could be his own way of protecting himself from getting hurt.

2. You Don’t Reciprocate His Love

Time is precious.

If a guy is making advances to you for a relationship and you’re not noticing his efforts let alone reciprocating the love back, sooner than later, he’ll find the exit door because he’ll assume that you’re not interested in him.

Learn to appreciate a guy’s gestures and efforts even the smallest of them with a warm smile, a thank you’, and so on will go a long way in making him feel loved and appreciated

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3. You Are Always Available For Him

Learn to leverage on scarcity to increase your respect and worth before a guy.

Even if you love him, don’t always be available and accessible for him. C’mon, you’re a lady, if he’s really into you, he would always want to be around you at every slightest opportunity.

While trying to play hard to get, ensure not to do it in excess and learn when to match the break because it might eventually turn to a red flag if done in excess.

Making yourself too available means he can ignore you whenever he feels like it and that’s against the Ladies code.

4. He Has Options

If he’s already in a relationship or in an entanglement with someone else, he might not commit fully and may gradually pull away if you ain’t dancing to his tone as fast as he want.

If you’re into him already and you notice that he’s suddenly pulling away, the best thing to do is to also let him go instead of trying to force him because if you do so and he finally agrees, the relationship is prone to be a toxic one because he may capitalize on that to his advantage.

5. He’s Confused

If you’ve been with the guy for some time and he starts pulling away from you, it could be that the intense physical attraction he feels towards you is beginning to fade.

He might have mistaken lust for love. And now that the lust is gradually fading away probably because you ain’t giving in to his demands, he will convince himself that you’re not a good match for each other because the love hasn’t yet fully developed to fill in the gap the lust created.

How To Get A Guy To Respect You After You Sleep With Him

To a lot of guys, getting in between a lady’s legs is the climax of a relationship, but in the real sense, there’s more to a relationship than just having sex.

How to get a guy to respect you after you Sleep with them

Why do guys stop talking to you after you sleep with them?why do guys distance themselves after intimacy?, why do guys change after you sleep with them? how do you know if a guy likes you after you sleep with him? and more are a few of the burning questions on the lips of ladies begging for answers.

The truth is that not all guys will change their attitude towards you after sleeping with you, so will even fall in love with you the more.

As a girl, if you’re afraid of losing your respect to a guy after sleeping with him, here are ways of how to get a guy to respect you after you sleep with him:

1. Stay Focused

Nothing gives a man a mental orgasm than a woman who’s goal-oriented.

If you must command respect from a man even after sleeping with him, you should work on your standards, maintain who you are, and pursue your goals.

Never allow the sexual encounter to get into your head rather see it as mere fun and channel your energy on things that will make you become a better version of yourself which includes but not limited to working on improving your career, standards, and ultimately your physical looks.

If you do these, you’re a typical description of “beauty with brains”, and trust me, you would be the choice lady for every man.

2. Do Not Be Too Forward

Women tend to fall madly in love with a guy after an adventurous and satisfactory sexual intimacy.

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Men are notorious when it comes to playing with Ladies emotions especially when they find out that they are very good in bed and that you can’t get over them nor have enough of them.

Some women will reduce themselves to bugging the guy with calls, love text messages, underserved attention and so on which in the grand scheme of things should be the other way round.

By so doing, you’ve lost your worth before the guy as a lady and have also exposed your weakness which will directly make you vulnerable to sexual exploitation.

3. Give Him Enough Space

As humans, we all cherish our private space and that.s why we always make out time out from our schedules to have a private moment all to ourselves.

No man or woman will be happy if their private time and space are being interrupted by anything, not even their loved one’s because having your private time is very productive and essential for your personal growth and development.

So, as a Lady, if you still want the man to respect you after you slept with him, give him his space and watch the magic happen.

4. Do Not Fall Cheaply For Him

Be in total control of your emotions.

Women are known to be very emotional when it comes to love and intimacy.

Some women make the brutal mistake of offering their bodies to men as proof of love.

If you’re in this category, it’s high time you desist from it if your respect and dignity as a woman still matters to you and it’d never going to make him want you the more.

So you know, men are very particular about what they want in a woman.

Let me reveal a secret to you, “guys will definitely change and likely stop talking to you after you sleep with them easily because they will think that that’s how you also open your legs to other guys who come in contact with you”.

If you let a man have a taste of your honey pot easily, he will never respect you for any reason.

5. Let The Man Do The Casing

Men are naturally meant to chase a woman and not the other way round.

In our today’s society, the narrative is gradually changing as society now applauds ladies who pursue a guy she likes for a relationship.

Although I’m not against such exhibition of courage and boldness- in fact it’s laudable because girls who can pull such stunts are few but hey! that’s also the surest way to lose your respect before a guy because he may capitalize on that to emotionally blackmail you and he’ll see you as a desperate lady.

Maintain the status quo and allow nature to take its course instead of pursuing shadows.

Set your standards and let the man work hard to chase you if the sex was good for him. Probably, he might reward you with a relationship with the woman he sees in you!


We’ve seen some of the reasons for the question ,why do guys distance themselves after intimacy in a relationship?, why guys pull away after falling in love with you and  how to get a guy to respect you after you slept with him.

Let’s you forget, here’s a recap of reasons why guys distance themselves after intimacy:

1. He’s Scared

2. He Sees Intimacy As Fun

3. He Didn’t Enjoy The Sex

4. You’re Too Forward

5. You’re Too Clingy

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